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Ever since that little adventure in my dream I have felt... different. As if by confirming that I am only part of what I thought I was, the division between the two parts has become noticeable. They loathe each other and what I am in the waking world can't be either of them.
I am having difficulties thinking of myself as Sephiroth when I am mostly something else. The only name I've known. My memories are mostly his. The rest only having come into existence recently.
Do I even want to be what I thought I was? What would I become without the fragment of Sephiroth? Is there enough to continue existing without it? What would happen to that fragment if it were separated from me?
So many questions and I feel there is limited time to find answers.
I am having difficulties thinking of myself as Sephiroth when I am mostly something else. The only name I've known. My memories are mostly his. The rest only having come into existence recently.
Do I even want to be what I thought I was? What would I become without the fragment of Sephiroth? Is there enough to continue existing without it? What would happen to that fragment if it were separated from me?
So many questions and I feel there is limited time to find answers.
no subject
Date: 2010-01-26 01:29 am (UTC)Sorry. I couldn't resist.
Seriously though, learning who you are can be one of the most challenging things in life, especially with the sort of complications you face.
It's something that no one else can do for you.
no subject
Date: 2010-01-26 01:38 am (UTC)It's true that I need to face this myself but, getting another perspective could be helpful.
no subject
Date: 2010-01-26 05:24 am (UTC)Just an idea.
no subject
Date: 2010-01-26 03:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-26 03:17 am (UTC)If I decide to go by a different name it will be one I choose myself.