Video, no filters

[hyperpsyche.livejournal.com]

*Oh hey, the stranger in this post looks awfully familiar. It's Ren, sitting in the Disney Castle library, and she doesn't look like she's gotten all that much sleep lately.

She doesn't seem aware that the video has started recording yet. She's muttering angrily under her breath and hitting herself in the forehead a lot.*

Yeah, real fricking smart, Ren. Just disappear for weeks again and not check in with anyone because your procrastination and your fricking social anxiety decided to gang up on you. Like no one would wonder or worry or anything. You know better than that! Stupid, stupid, stupid...

*She glances at the camera to see if it's ready yet and looks startled as she realizes it caught her entire tirade. Oops. She reaches out to shut it off out of embarrassment, catches herself, and sighs before deciding to own up.*

Hi, guys. No, I'm not dead, and yes, I'm an irresponsible idiot for not letting anyone know earlier. I've been... distracted lately. And stupid. Again.

I caught a ride out to Disney Castle a little while back and promptly holed myself up in the library. I wanted to see if I could research any leads on how to restore the worlds we lost to Darkness. And so far, I've had absolutely no luck. I've been looking pretty much night and day, but... *She sighs wearily and runs a hand through her hair.*

...I'm sorry, everyone. I just wanted to find a reason to give us hope. But all I've done is waste time. I'm sorry.

((OOC: And this is what happens when I get all wrapped up in making up for idling out of XI a while back. Way to go, self. But anyway, this is where Ren has been hiding for the past few weeks, cutting herself off from social contact in the midst of her research, then feeling shy and awkward when she realizes that this is not a good thing and putting things off even more.))